THE MOOHO COW

Once upon a time, in a galaxy far far away their lived a cow. This cow wasn’t any old cow it was a cow that didn’t say moo. This messed up cow said mooho. And this mooho cow’s owner was named Bob, Bob lived in Tomahawk, Wisconsin. Bob has a dead mom, dead dad, and a sister. The sisters name is Barbra.

Bob was at his house during a partly ordinary day. This day was partly ordinary because he didn’t know that his sister was coming over to his house.
LATER THAT DAY

Barbra: Hey Bob you lazy but get off the couch.

Bob: Why are you here?

Barbra: Well it’s Christmas and family should be with family during Christmas.

Bob: Ok just as long as you don’t touch the mooho cow it is the only of its kind.

Barbra: You know that I have short term memory loss so don’t count on it.

Bob: Fine I’ll write a sign on the cow saying don’t touch.

Bob: I have to go to town to pick up some food for the mooho cow.

LATER WHEN BOB IS IN THE CAR DRIVING

Man, why does she have to be my sister I hate her a lot. She is very selfish and is always mad at people. Ok just live with it and let her stay here for a while. I should just not go home and stay at a hotel for the rest of the week so she gets so bored that she leaves.

LATER WHEN BOB GETS HOME

Barbra: Why, Why did it take so long for you to go to the store?

Bob: This isn’t like the city stores are miles and miles away.

Barbra: Ok, is there a shower?

Bob: No, the shower is in the pond.

Barbra: See you later I’s going to be like an alligator.

MILK THAT COW

She really is a city girl all she does is act like she has everything she needs just like in the city. I can wait until she figures out the there is no electricity here. Man this is the hardest cow that I have ever milked. You know what it would be cool if she gave me a cool device that milks cows for me, like she would ever do that.

2 DAYS TILL CHRISTMAS

Man I really slept well I wonder if “Barbra is up yet. Barbra, Barbra where are you”. I find a note on the kitchen counter saying be back soon went to go get my coffee (I didn’t bother reading the PS). Ok now that she’s gone time to check up on Mooho cow. Where is Mooho cow I can’t find him anywhere? I go and look at the note again it says PS: I moved Mooho cow to the backyard so I could sleep in the barn. I was comfier than that thing that you call bed.

ARRIVAL HOME

Wow I can’t believe that the closest coffee shop was 30 minutes away. And that coffee tasted very good now to finish the rest of it. “HEY MAN why would you do that I am very mad at you now you don’t just go to some woman and spill her coffee without a good reason what is you reason.”

Bob: Um um… I tripped over that piece of hair

Barbra: You don’t just trip over hair.

Bob: Ok let’s settle this the old fashioned way.

Barbra: What might that be?

Bob: Old fashioned arm wrestling.

Barbra: Fine you know that I am stronger.

Bob: No you aren’t.

Bob and Barbra: Man this is harder than I thought I will have to give it my all.

Bob: I knew it you lost and I won.

Barbra: Fine but I am still mad at you.

MAN I’M TIRED

It’s time to go to sleep Barbra. Don’t think about going to sleep in the cow barn you can get ticks and flees and by the way you slept on the wrong bed yours is on the right not the left.

Barbra: Oh then what was on the left.

Bob: You don’t want to know.

CHRISTMAS EVE

Bob: Barbra, I was going to go shopping for you. What would you like for Christmas.

Barbra: I would like it if you got me a leather jacket or a furry jacket. What would you like for Christmas?

Bob: I would like to get one of those popcorn machines because you know how much I like to eat popcorn.

Barbra: Ok is that all.

Bob: Yes.

AT THE STORE WHERE BOB IS SHOPPING

Bob mindlessly talking: Do you think she would like the leather one or the furry one? I think that she might want that furry one because it has been so cold lately so she needs to stay warm. Ok that is the one I will get.

AT THE STORE THAT BARBRA IS AT

Barbra mindlesslly talking: I think that Bob has been milking that cow a lot and that he needs to get one of the things that milk the cow, not a popcorn maker. Actually I think I should get him both of them to make him happy.

BACK AT HOME

Bob: Go in the bed room take the gift wrap, tape, and scissors and wrap your present or presents and I will wrap mine right here.

TEN MINUTES LATER

Barbra: All wrapped up, now to go to bed after a long days work.

CHRISTMAS DAY

Bob: I think that you should unwrap your present first

Barbra: Ok, OMG I’ve always wanted one of these and you even got the one with real fur. You really know how to make a woman happy after you spilled her coffee. Now unwrap both of your presents.

Bob: Ok, SWEET how did you know I didn’t even put it on my list and you got me the thing that helps me milk cows faster. And there is even another one. Let us see what this one is. A popcorn popper you didn’t have to get me two presents, the one would be enough.

Bob and Barbra: (think in their heads) This is the best Christmas ever.